A Longing Fulfilled
Part 1 is here if you missed it yesterday.
While my wife took care of the copay, I took the referral for the sonogram and hurriedly called the closest locations, hoping that we could get squeezed in that evening even though it was already 4:58pm. The first location I called led me through some menus and then to the prerecorded message: “We’re sorry. The office is now closed. Our normal business hours are 8am to 5pm Monday throu….” I hung up and hurriedly called the second location. Same message. ARGH! At this point, I’m panicking more than a little. I called the third location and…YES! A human! While they couldn’t see us that evening, she scheduled us for the very first appointment available the next day at 12:45pm. The drive home was filled with anxiety.
I always have a lot to say but I’ve learned over two pregnancies that it’s best for a man to keep his mouth shut whenever it comes to anything regarding pregnancy. Telling a woman, “WOW! I’ve seen my fair share of pregnant women but you are PREG NANT!” will get you slapped and ensure you won’t be getting any action in the foreseeable future; telling a woman the wrong thing in a situation like this could wound her for the foreseeable future.
“Remember at the couples retreat a few weeks ago,” my wife began, “and how they prayed for all the pregnant women? I felt like a fraud because the other ladies were clearly pregnant. Maybe I imagined this whole thing? What if the baby’s gone?” Numerous other what if’s followed but for some reason, I was sure the baby was still in there. I placed my hand on my wife’s belly and reassured her, “It’s going to be ok.” What else could I say?
My wife texted a few ladies, one who went through numerous miscarriages. We got home and I told my mom the news. We agreed that we’d be praying. Hard.
The Bible says, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.” Our house had been on the market for a very long time. We got an offer in late September but the potential buyer flaked out. It looked like our home would never be sold. Finances were getting tight and living with my parents was challenging. To my wife, this just seemed like another case of hope being deferred.
The next morning, as we were getting ready for work, my mom pulls me aside and says, “You know you lost the baby because you told people too early, right?” Most Koreans I know are more than a littlestitious, and my mom is no different. Apparently, one of her friend’s daughters told people immediately after she got pregnant and she miscarried. For D1 and D2, we waited until the 1st trimester was over before making announcements; for this one, we announced it about a month and a half in.
After a half day of work, I picked my wife up and we headed to the radiologist. The way my wife was carrying that referral, you’d think it weighed a ton. She also had to pee really bad. As if it’s not enough that they insist your bladder be completely full, they then jab around your bladder with the vaginal ultrasound thing.
The technician inserted the probe and