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Merciful Monday: 10.11.10

October 11, 2010 Leave a comment Go to comments

For the new visitors, Merciful Monday is a series in which I apologize and plead for mercy from things and people I have wronged to start the week off with a clean slate. And if there’s anything I’ve learned from nearly 6 years of marriage, it’s that apologizing early and often is a good thing. So here we go:

To vegetarians: Have Mercy! I’m hosting a BBQ this weekend for a ravenous pack of carnivores and will be posting all the glorious pictures on Monday. I’ll be smoking brisket, pork butt, and grilling my famous (to me) sweet & sour chicken and flank steak with chipotle-lime sauce. The only vegetables I plan on consuming are corn (in cornbread) and carrot (cake). So if the site of succulent animal flesh offends you, I apologize.

To my arteries and heart: Have Mercy! I’m giving you advanced warning: you’re going to have to work overtime this week. I know. I know. No one ever likes to work on weekends and no, I won’t be paying you time-and-a-half for your efforts, but I need you to work extra hard this weekend. And yes, I know. Life isn’t fair. Tongue gets to have all the foodgasms while you get to have palpitations. To help you out, I won’t look at pictures of things wrapped in bacon that make me hard – my arteries that is.

To the squirrel family living near my parents’ house: Have Mercy! I assure you, I was not under the influence of anything more than caffeine when the accident happened. I did everything in my power to avoid your son/daughter. He/she stopped in the middle of the road, staring at me. I positioned my car so that I would pass over him/her, but I guess he/she decided to move because I heard a *thump* followed by a slightly softer *thump*. My condolences on your terrible loss.

To my eyes: Have Mercy! You’ve been getting weaker and weaker as of late, especially since I stare at a computer all day at work. So I installed WorkRave on my computer, but I either skip over the breaks because I have blogs to read important work to do or I take a break by doing stuff on my iFriend.

What about you? What do you need forgiveness for?

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  1. TK
    October 11, 2010 at 10:59 am

    I would like the thank the elderly couple that signaled me to roll down my car window. They kindly informed me that my trunk was open. I felt ashamed for cutting them off five minutes before that. OI!!

    • Pop
      October 12, 2010 at 9:17 am

      I once cut off my own mother. Not kidding. I was on my way to her house and she was driving a friend’s car and I unwittingly cut her off (pretty bad too). I later pulled into her driveway and noticed the car I cut off pulling up.

  2. October 11, 2010 at 12:12 pm

    Will the squirrel be on the weekend menu as well?

    • Pop
      October 12, 2010 at 9:31 am

      Yup. Debating on grilled or smoked.

  3. KLZ
    October 11, 2010 at 12:35 pm

    Mmmmm….BBQ….Have Mercy indeed!

    • Pop
      October 12, 2010 at 9:32 am

      Best part about BBQ is that I smell like it for days on end. Worst part: I basically blow charcoal out of my nose.

  4. October 11, 2010 at 1:44 pm

    I would like to ask forgiveness to the other parents at the library today. I took the kids over to hang out straight from the gym. Sweaty and gross and mismatched gym clothes and all. I just don’t have time to stop in the middle for a shower. Sorry for stinkin’ up the library, guys!

    • Pop
      October 12, 2010 at 9:35 am

      Hey. You gotta do what you gotta do.

  5. October 11, 2010 at 4:37 pm

    Haha! Poor squirrely! My house have mercy on me. I am too damn busy to clean and organize and decorate you for fall. I will get there although it will probably be after Xmas. Love me

    • Pop
      October 12, 2010 at 9:41 am

      Don’t worry. I guarantee you that mess will be there after Christmas. Just like my leaves that won’t rake themselves.

  6. October 11, 2010 at 9:12 pm

    Pork butt always makes me laugh.

    • Pop
      October 12, 2010 at 9:48 am

      Me too. I love going in and saying, “Give me the biggest butts you’ve got!” I’m pretty sure I took that old Toys R Us song literally.

  7. October 12, 2010 at 1:50 am

    You have scarred me for life. Squirrel murderer! LOL! I’ve never ran over a living creature but there is a particular pigeon that loves to dive-bomb my windshield when I pass through his neighborhood on my way to work. I think he’s an adrenaline junkie, trying to see how close he can get without actually killing himself. And then it happened–he finally cut it too close and he made contact. I thought it must have been enough to kill him b/c I didn’t see him again for a while. I started taking another route to work and when I used it again one day months later, he was back, and up to his old tricks! So although I’m glad to know I didn’t kill him, I’m thinking it’s just a matter of time.

    • Pop
      October 12, 2010 at 9:49 am

      I had a bird that kept doing that too. Had being the operative word. Now that I think about it, maybe I killed it. Oops.

  8. October 12, 2010 at 2:21 am

    Your BBQ does sound like a vegetarian’s worst nightmare. And so yummy.

    • Pop
      October 12, 2010 at 9:52 am

      I like to quote Homer Simpson: You don’t win friends with salad.

  9. liz
    October 12, 2010 at 8:24 am

    I’ve always loved me a good (rare) steak, but found a whole new level of love for BBQ when we moved to Memphis!

    • Pop
      October 12, 2010 at 9:58 am

      I’ve yet to try Memphis BBQ – it’s been on my list for some time now. Memphis BBQ: Have mercy! I’m a comin!!!

  10. October 12, 2010 at 10:21 am

    Squirrels don’t count, dude. No worries. Bunny rabbits and dogs though…you’d be in trouble for that. I’m undecided on cats.

    • Pop
      October 13, 2010 at 8:50 am

      I’d be mortified if I ran over a bunny rabbit. There’s this one cat in my neighborhood that likes to rip through my trash bags and scare the crap out of me when I go out in the backyard. I’d run over it if I had the chance.

      • October 13, 2010 at 10:47 am

        The day will come. Be ready.

        • Pop
          October 13, 2010 at 1:11 pm

          I won’t miss. Promise.

  11. October 12, 2010 at 10:30 am

    have mercy on my blogging soul for the intoxication that i spread yesterday.

    seriously.

    • Pop
      October 13, 2010 at 8:51 am

      Just yesterday? I thought that was everyday?

      • October 13, 2010 at 11:32 am

        you’re SO onto me.
        Dammit

  12. October 12, 2010 at 4:06 pm

    BBQ — that would REALLY hit the spot right now.

    And I go out of my way to avoid those little creatures, but sometimes they are just too fast…you did your part!

    • Pop
      October 13, 2010 at 8:59 am

      I’m pretty sure I’ve run into (pun intended) some suicidal critters.

  13. October 12, 2010 at 9:44 pm

    Corn(bread) and carrot(cake) are my favorite veggies! No apologies required, Twin! Enjoy your BBQ and try a little better next week. Squirrel passings happen, but go easy on those eyes, k? xoxo

    • Pop
      October 13, 2010 at 9:00 am

      This is why we are Twins. Hope you’re feeling ok today.

  14. October 14, 2010 at 9:59 am

    Merciful MOndays is wonderful!!! How could I have lived life before without it.
    Never again, have mercy, never again…

    • Pop
      October 14, 2010 at 10:01 am

      LOL. I forgive you, Alexandra. Though you need to stop ignoring my spam mail! 😛

  15. October 14, 2010 at 4:49 pm

    ROFL! My hubs barbecues as well – his pulled pork and chicken thighs are my favorite. And of course, his sausage. (Mind out of the gutter!) I, too, hit a squirrel last week – R.I.P. – and am busy reading blogs at work, though I’m quite behind.

    • Pop
      October 18, 2010 at 9:23 am

      LOL about the sausage. I wasn’t even thinking that. 😛

  1. January 10, 2011 at 12:38 pm

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